I made new waldorf dolls!!

And although they aren't perfect, I'm pretty darn proud!
The button jointed doll is much easier to sew than the traditional doll. But I really like the traditional dolls better.
The girl is for Miss Sofia. The boy is for a friend that has the most adorable little boy who Sofia is going to marry someday.
My sewing machine is in the shop until tomorrow... so they're naked for now :)tomorrow, I'll get started on that.

I'm sick....

I think it's a stomach virus. I woke up throwing up. At 4 in the morning.
I was angry that Alex wasn't there. I was dreading getting up to take O to school. (We made it, but I stayed in my jammies. You can always throw on some Uggs over jammies and still look cute. I swear, it's the shoes that does it. Plus.. no need to find socks.)
I did let her skip band, though.
What do you do when a kid doesn't want to stick with something like band? She wanted to do it at the beginning of the year, and now she wants to quit. Do you let them quit? Do you make them stick to it? I just don't know.
My sewing machine should be back from the shop tomorrow. I don't know yet if it will cost me anything or not. If it's a computer problem like they think it is... then it's covered under warranty. If it's mechanical.... well, I'll be screwed. I want it back. I have diapers to sew!
Carmen turned 1. She is crazy walking around talking. She kicks Sofia's ass all the time. She just charges her and knocks her down. Isn't that backwards? Isn't the big kid supposed to beat on the littler kid? Not in this house, I guess. My poor little Sofia!! Little Curly Sue. Little Mo-beef!
She can hold her own, she just needs to realize it.
Alex comes home Saturday!! I'm so excited. I can't wait for this job to be over for good. I want my husband home all the time!

My husband said......

That the doll looks like a teletubby.
She does NOT.
Does she???

I made Sofia a waldorf doll.

She LOVES her. I have never seen her like this with any toy. Ever. This doll is magical.
Waldorf dolls are very special. They are made of all natural materials...cotton knit skin, wool yarns for hair, and are stuffed with pure carded wool. It may have been the most difficult thing that I've ever made. She is NOT perfect but I've been told I did very well for my first try.


Here she is before I sewed up the jammies and hat...

I AM working on the hair... but it's hard and time consuming.

Minimizing Christmas...

Or not really Christmas... But the excess in gifts, toys, materialism.
I'm trying to explain it to Olivia now. We've always gotten her everything on her list. And I don't want to do that anymore. I want to get/make the girls each a few special things. I don't want to rush out to the store, list in hand, and buy everything on a piece of paper.
I explained to Olivia that it's better this way.
We'll celebrate the season wholeheartedly, listening to music. Baking cookies. Cutting down and decorating a tree. Crafts and projects. Stories by the fire.
Olivia asked... "Why? Are we poor now?" I told her: "No, I just want Christmas to be about Christmas and not just about getting 'stuff'."
I'm not sure she understands but I want to make this Christmas the best Christmas ever without the excess. And then maybe she'll understand.

I *can* and *do* suck at something!

Painting furniture. I suck at it. I just figured... well... this may sound bad, but I have done well in everything I've tried to do so far.
My first cake ever:

Carving pumpkins...


photography:

sewing:

I mean.... I try something and I just do pretty well. But I painted a bookshelf and chair for Miss Sofia and it doesn't look so hot. I don't have a picture yet, but let me tell ya. This baby needs some touch ups. It *is* cute. And from far away it looks pretty darn good. But I really thought I'd have done a better job.
So much for my dreams of buying cool old furniture pieces and refinishing them.

I think it's mostly because I didn't sand. I painted stripes and the blue tape pulled paint AND primer off in chunks. That isn't supposed to happen, right? Damn. I knew I should have rough sanded. But I have so many things on my to do list that I thought that i'd just skip that step and it'd be just fine.
Hmph!

OKAY.

I'm nearly done unpacking... but I guess I've hit a slump. I can't make myself finish. So there are random boxes here and there, just waiting.
The dog is insane. He zooms around the house bouncing off the walls. But at the dog park he's a chicken shit. He killed his hedgehog today. First he pulled out the squeaker. Then he spread the stuffing all over the room. He was 17 lbs when we got him a month ago. He is now 37 lbs. I need to measure his height but haven't found either of my measuring tapes.
The girls are all wonderful. Beautiful and sweet. Miss O has started 5th grade and is loving her class. She wants to join band and play the trumpet. Funny... my girl and her trumpet. Sofia is talking non-stop and I can understand pretty much everything. Except when she's speaking spanish. She definitely knows more spanish than I do. Carmen is crawling around, says ooow, and uh-oh. she pulls up to standing now and wants to suck on the dog.
That's it in a nutshell. Life is busy. Very busy. But good.

Moving stinks.

And would somebody tell my husband that it is easier to do a u-haul in 1 day than to space loads out over several days in the back of a truck or our minivan?? I *think* he thinks that it's easier since you don't have to do it all at once... but it isn't. We could get it done in one day, but nope. And he refuses to ask for help. Our neighbor is helping a bit. But he wants to do it all himself. I told him to call up his army buddies and have them come down, get a u-haul and it'd be over in a few hours. Nope. Won't ask. Grrr.
I love my stubborn husband, though.

Yep, another one!

I promise I'll start posting more interesting things as soon as puppy fever wears off!

Mmmmmmm. Puppy breath!

Our newest addition!!

His name is Odin and he's an 8 week old Merle Great Dane. He's just the sweetest little guy but he won't stay little for long!

I'm ready....

to go home. I feel blessed that we've been able to take such a long vacation. We visited San Francisco, Los Angeles, Disneyland and Knotts Berry Farm, Mexico, and now Texas... visiting my wonderful inlaws. We're going over to Schlitterbahn (In New Braunfels, Tx) Monday. Which for the past 8 years has been voted #1 waterpark in the world. I'm so excited to play like a kid in the water! Although not so much at the thought of getting into a bathing suit. Seriously. I look just fine in jeans. Without them.... well, that's another story.
We'll be heading home next Sunday. How wonderful it has been to be able to just "take a couple months". I'm so blessed that Alex was able to take a couple months off work to travel! We didn't go anywhere exotic, but it's ok. We've made amazing memories that will last a lifetime. Besides... Next spring when Carmen is weaned, we will be going somewhere alone. The honeymoon that will be 5 years overdue. I'm picturing white sand, turquoise water, drinks with umbrellas....
I will be sad to end this journey, but so happy to be home in my own bed. Happy to reunite with my photography and my sewing. And the wonderful tap water. And my family.
While away our dog Sadie had to be put down. It hasn't hit me, really. But I'm sure it will when we get home. When I see something of hers. Poor, poor Sadie Mae. I hope she was as happy as she seemed.
We'll be home soon and life will be normal again.... whatever that means.

Look, mama!! Look what I can do!

Where IS IT??????

That pink and aqua dress I made for Sofia... I can NOT find it ANYWHERE. The pants too, so I'm sure they have to be together, right??? But I've looked everywhere. I even dug through the bags of clothes in the basement. Went through the closets. Three times even. I've looked under the bed. I've looked in every diaper bag. The car. My fabric stash. EVERYWHERE. How can an entire outfit disappear? Seriously. It's 2:24 in the morning and I can't sleep because I'm so annoyed. I can make another. I have the fabric. But geez. Where IS IT???

They're MINE!

And I LOVE them!

Anxiety

I've been an anxious type all my life and sometimes my anxiety gets pretty yucky. I used to have a prescription that I could take every now and then when I was feeling particularly anxiety ridden... but for the past 3 years I've been pregnant or breastfeeding (or both!)and haven't been able to take anything.
Yeah, I know. Diet, exercise, vitamins... blah, blah, blah... Those things really never helped me. For the past 3 days or so I've been feeling it. I know I'm excited about Alex leaving the army, but maybe it's causing a little anxiety too? I can't quite pin point it. But I also can't think of anything else that could be causing it. My chest just feels tight and I have a bit of a butterfly feeling in my stomach.
I KNOW that caffeine doesn't help, and I always drink a morning latte. I'm quitting coffee tomorrow. Too late today. Already drank some. I do hope that will help.

Today is our last day......

as a military family!!!!!!
I'm just happy. Alex is handling it. Tomorrow we start the next chapter. It's exciting. I've never been in a situation where I didn't know exactly what would happen before. There is a plan in place.... BUT we can change our minds if we want to. And we can change them however many times we want to. The military doesn't own my husband anymore! We're going to make our own rules from tomorrow on!

Bitchy Know-it-alls...

I'm a magnet for them. I'm nice. I'm polite. I'm intelligent. So why do I attract these people? I don't talk out of my ass (usually). If I don't know something... I say so. If I do know something and can be helpful, I nicely try and help.
I don't get why some people are always argumentative. And passive aggressive.
Whatever.

Can't. Stop. EATING.

I'm just ravenous ALL the time! Like now... it's past midnight. I should be sleeping but I was just SO hungry I snarfed down a cheddarwurst. With spicy brown mustard. That was good. Just a hotdog and a fork and some mustard. Real good. The scary part..... I really, and I mean REALLY, want another. But I will not succumb. I'm stronger than Johnsonville. I think. I hope.
Last night, I woke up at 2:30 am because Alex and I fell asleep on the couch. I had a bowl of honey nut cheerios before getting into bed. Why? I felt like I hadn't eaten in a week.
I hope this stops soon! My ass can't take any more weight. ;)

Head over heels!

It's so amazing.... the feelings I get just thinking about my husband and my girls. I never imagined life could be so wonderful. Perfect even.

Alex is finally getting out of the army. 2 weeks and counting. 7 deployments, countless trips to the field, long hours and frustration. We're opening a new chapter. It's scary and exciting.
He loves his job. Being an Army Ranger meant the world to him. He did an amazing job at home and during combat. He was awarded a bronze star, fought long and hard, helped many people and now it's time. I can see his longing for it already, but I can see his excitement about building something new. This man.... I can't say enough. He is brilliant. He is strong. He is loving. He is proud. I love him. And the best part.... I KNOW he loves us more than anything. It's nice to have absolutely no doubts. He is my air.

He's taking 2 months off before starting his new job. During these months, we will travel, relax, plan and dream. The new job is another can of worms to be opened when the time actually comes.... But until then, I can relish in the fact that I'll have my husband all to myself for a couple of months.

I can't get ANYTHING done lately!

And it's not for lack of trying! I just can't seem to find time. Although I *AM* sitting here.... and I could be doing something else.
Alex is home. He's perfect. Maybe that's why I can't get anything done! We're catching up on everything we've missed out on in the last few months. we've visited relatives, had Easter, stayed up late talking and dreaming, visited the zoo.
Another thing... I am really not motivated to do anything. I should be motivated to sew. I have the cutest fabrics for little girly dresses. But even the thought of those yummy soft cotton fabrics aren't enticing enough. Got a new serger. Still not motivated.
I am seriously tired all the time. I'm going to the gym tonight... haven't been in 2 weeks and I'm feeling it. I think if I get there again, I'll wake up. i'll feel better and my energy will come back.

Soon....

I will be complete once again. I will have the love of my life back right where he belongs. I will have my best friend home! My husband. My soul mate. My world. My air.

Look what we're making!!!

Diaper Divas!!
Yep, it's official. I need help. But this is SO addicting! Go ahead... click it. You know you want to!
It's fun... there's a contest going right now and whoever posts the most this month gets a cool prize... an embroidered pocket diaper!

Diaper Divas

I love talking to my husband.

I love his laugh. It's so full of life. I can see his eyes shine from thousands of miles away just listening to his laugh over the phone. *sigh* I miss that man. Before too long he'll be home with us again and, oh, I have butterflies just thinking about it!

Watch out, boys!

Beauty!

Sewing is sooooo wonderful! And it fits her perfectly!

The gym....

Exactly HOW long do I need to go before I see results? I have been there 3 times a week for 6 weeks and I swear, there is no difference in my wobbly bits (Thanks for the phrase, Jones) I've been eating healthier. I would have thought that I'd be seeing SOMETHING.
*Sigh*.

I talked to Alex today. I'm so much in love with that man! He really is amazing. I know I say it a lot. But really, I could never say it enough.

Which random phallic object are you?

Which random phallic object are you?
Quiz by Andrea.

I was looking through my pictures... this is how I KNOW they're mine!!

6 foot 4 with rock hard muscles, and he sews. Alex is now allowed on the *good* machine. He wasn't when this picture was taken. He's still NOT going to be allowed near my new Ginghers. He may never be.
Olivia was sewing a pencil pouch she designed from scratch. She's brilliant.

Baby lust? Now? Already?

I mean... come on!
I went for my annual today... and since I haven't had a period yet (I'm nursing... so I wouldn't expect one!) the doctor made me take a blood pregnancy test. As I was driving home, I felt that tickle of anticipation. Deep down I KNOW I'm not pregnant. But there is a part of me that sort of wished that by some strange fluke, my fertility returned early and we caught it before Alex was deployed.
No. I know it's not likely. Probably more likely that Alex is pregnant. Which is obviously impossible. Sigh.
I thought today: what if I can't stop having babies? What if I can't control myself and I end up with 14 kids? I can see that happening. Because when baby fever hits me it knocks the sense out of me. Obviously. Listen to me! Alex would have a heart attack if he even knew this thought was being entertained. Logically... no more than 5. I will NOT drive a full sized van! A mini van is as far as I go. And I never thought I'd go there!
We were originally planning to have 4. But after Carmen was born and I realized that I only got to do it one more time, I raised. Alex wants 7. So if I want... I can raise again. And again. You never know where you might end up.

Update on Carmen

My tiny is off her antibiotics! We saw the pediatric nephrologist and he cleared her. He said he'd like to do a follow up ultrasound in April to monitor the progress, but that he was almost certain that it would be unremarkable!
I'm so relieved.
Not that there aren't a zillion other worries to be had..... but we can scratch this one off the list!

Sofia is 2!!!!

I can't believe how time flies. I remember laying in the hospital waiting for her to arrive, and I remember the first time I put her to the breast. I remember looking at her scrunched up red newborn face and savoring every moment, every breath, every inch of her soft skin.
Now she runs around chasing our poor doggy with her red plastic chair, throws the cel phone into the toilet, spills milk on purpose, steals Carmens binkie, tells ME no........ and I still savor every moment of this craziness.
My little girl is 2! And while I sometimes wish she could stay small forever, watching her grow is just as amazing.

What am I doing sitting here on my ass?

I REALLY need to get up and clean. But nope. Here I am. Parked on my butt when I have some serious work to do.

OK... well, I did pay bills. That's the fun on the 15th. Bills. And now that those are done, I need to get the real work done. But I don't want to. I hate dishes. I hate laundry. I hate vacuuming. I hate dusting. I hate taking out the garbage.
I wish I were one of those people who kept an immaculate home. I wish it were easy. I look at the fly-lady website and I cringe. I am not sure I am cut out for this.
Can't I just have a cleaning lady? The woman across the street has one that she really likes. And she only charges about $10/ hour. All I'd really need is about an hour or 2 or 5 a week. The thing about cleaning ladies, though, is they don't *do* your clutter. And that's most of my problem. My mom came over a few weeks ago and we clean sweep'd my living room. It's still clean. If you don't count the clean, unstuffed diapers on the rocking chair. The toys scattered about, the mail on the end table. That's an easy fix, though. That would take like 5 minutes to clean up.
The thing is.. I can't seem to get off my butt.

I made Sofia's birthday dress!

How cute is this?? I can't wait to take her 2 year pictures in it. I *hope* I can get her to sit still. But... she's 2. My baby is turning 2!!

I LOOOOOVE my Man-Muffin!

Beautiful Alex,
I am thinking about you on this Valentines day. I am the luckiest woman in the entire world. The way you love me is like nothing else. I wish everyone could experience a love like this. Something so deep that it sometimes makes my heart ache with a feeling that it could explode at any moment. I LOVE YOU. A thousand times, a million times. I love you.
Your Wife.

Poor Sadie is going to start insulin Monday.

I have to check her blood sugar 4 times a day for at least a week to see how she reacts to the starting dose of insulin. She'll only get 1 shot per day to start, but it could go up to 2. I hope it's as easy as giving people injections. I hope she doesn't think I'm being mean to her when I give her the shots.
This picture is older.... about a year and a half ago. She's lost a lot of weight now so is a lot skinnier.
I'm not really even a dog person.... but she's ours and we love her.

My fattycakes baby!

Isn't she just yummy?!?! I can't believe how big she already is. It seems like it was just yesterday that I was in labor.

The results:

Looks like she has diabetes AND she may also have Addisons disease (adrenal problem) I still have to bring her back for the chest xray and EKG.
I'll probably have to give her insulin shots daily, and we'll see what else she'll need.

The vet:

said Sadie may have something wrong with her heart. She has a significant murmur that wasn't noted in October when her tumors were removed. Great.
I'm supposed to get her an ECG and some chest x-rays. I did the blood work today, and I should get those results tomorrow.
Poor, poor little Sadie Mae.

Sadie... again.

Today, our dalmation Sadie is going to the vet. A few months back, we had her in and had some tumors removed from her head and neck. We didn't biopsy them because even if she *did* have cancer we couldn't afford to pay for doggy cancer treatment. The surgery was costly just to remove them. Anyway. She's now really losing a lot of weight and I wish that we would have done the biopsy so I'd know whether this is cancer making her lose weight.
She's going to the vet because I need to know whether she needs comfort while she gets sicker.... or if (fingers crossed) it's a simple fix like a parasite that can be cured with a pill. She's really old, 12 years, so I expect her to act elderly.... but this weight loss scares me.
I hope she's ok.

Personal trainers....

Mandy got *THE* bowflex guy... Mr Bowflex.
I got Brian.

Not fair.

It's ok, though, because my husband is hotter than Mr Bowflex anyway!

Real Phobias...

1. Ablutophobia- Fear of washing or bathing

2. Arachibutyrophobia- Fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of the mouth. (No comment, seriously... what can you say about this one?)

3. Aulophobia- Fear of flutes.

4. Barophobia- Fear of gravity. (How does that one work??)

5. Bromidrosiphobia or Bromidrophobia- Fear of body smells. (Totally understandable)

6. Iophobia- Fear of poison. (I think I have this. Not bad, but I think I do. I am super paranoid about things that don't taste right, or if I think the seal on something doesn't pop loud enough I will throw it out.)

7. Francophobia- Fear of France or French culture. (Gallophobia, Galiophobia) (They have a phobia for any culture)

8. Geniophobia- Fear of chins. (Their own, or others chins? Or both?)

9. Mageirocophobia - Fear of cooking. (MY HUSBAND HAS THIS!!!!)

10. Venustraphobia - Fear of beautiful women. (Fear me!! Mwa-ha ha ha ha HA! Just kidding)

There are so many phobias.
I once knew a girl who was afraid of cotton balls. I used to get a bunch off the injection cart and I'd pop them in my mouth and chew on them in front of her. I'd also tape them all over her computer monitor or her phone handle. She hated that. She couldn't touch them to get them off. We were friends, though, so she never got too mad. I didn't find a name for that one, though. But I did find some talk about it here... http://www.unusualphobias.com/cotton.html and now I feel bad.

I am scared of heights, I'll cautiously look down off a cliff if there is a safe railing. Other than that... I don't go near the edge. I'm not scared of high roller coasters of anything, though.
I'm deathly afraid of bugs, snakes and spiders. I mean... there was a big spider in my bathroom once and I had to get the neighbor to come and take it outside because Alex was gone. Strange as I am... I won't let anyone kill them.

tagged by Konny : )

Four Jobs I've Had
1. Nurse at the Asian American clinic until I moved farther than I wanted to commute.
2. Nurse at an internal medicine clinic after moving.
Sad... I never had a job until I graduated nursing school.

Four Movies I Can Watch Over and Over
1. How Stella Got Her Groove Back!
2. Gladiator
3. Spiderman
4. Black Hawk Down

Four Places I've Lived
1. Seattle (born and raised)
2. Provo, Utah (Boarding school for naughty kids)
3. Snohomish, Wa.
4. Tacoma

Four TV Shows I Love to Watch
1. Survivor
2. American Idol (and I take Miss O to the concert at the end of the season too)
3. Laguna Beach on MTV (shut up... a guilty pleasure. Embarrassed to admit.. but watch it anyway)
4. OC

Four Places I've Been on Vacation
1. Disney!! So many times.... but it never gets old.
2. Hot-lanta Georgia. I visited Alex when he was in Ranger school.
3. Mexico
4. Texas, South Padre Island.

Four Blogs You Visit Daily
1. http://inhimitrust.blogspot.com/ (Only yours, Konnie!)

Four of Your Favorite Foods
1. Chicken and sausage gumbo
2. cajun chicken fetuccini (my own)
3. creme brulee
4. Vegetarian Sushi

Four Places You'd Rather Be
1. In my husbands arms... anywhere.
2. Disneyland.
3. ANYWHERE tropical, preferrably Jamaica. Stella did that to me!
4. Greece

Four Musical Artists You Love
1. Billie Holiday
2. Dave Matthews
3. Norah Jones
4. Ella Fitzgerald

Four Vehicles I've Owned
1. Pontiac Grand prix (I have no idea what year. I never added oil.. it died.)
2. A wood paneled station wagon.
3. 02 Trailblazer
4. 05 Uplander (WITH a DVD that we use! Alot.)

Four taggees: To the first 4 people to read this.... you're it!

Carmens 2 month check up...

All is good with my fatty cakes baby! She had her shots... which I hate. But I believe that immunizations are a good thing. She was weighed and measured.
Head: 60th percentile.
Length: 22 3/4 in 50-60th percentile.
Weight: 12lbs 15 oz (1 oz shy of 13 lbs!) 90th percentile!
I knew she was a chunker! Explains why she grows out of her diapers faster than I can make them. I can't wait to tell my husband what a big baby she is. She was 8lbs 11 oz at birth. In 2 months she's gained 4lb 4oz. On mamma's milk! It feels SO incredible to be able to provide EVERYTHING my baby needs to grow. So amazing.

My newest diaper creation....

How cute is this???

Dreaming.....

Of a vacation. A real vacation. A week or more someplace tropical, with turquoise water, coral reefs, fruit smoothies brought to us with umbrellas in them. Relaxing in the sun with no responsibilities. No house cleaning, no cooking, no laundry. I am dreaming of holding my baby on the beach under a huge umbrella while Alex splashes in the warm ocean with Olivia and Sofia.
There IS such a place, and I want to be there. I want my husband home, and I want US to be there.

The Seahawks....

Are going to the Superbowl. For the first time. Ever.

Does tea go bad?

I hope not. Because this is my day.
I wake up and make myself a cup of tea. (After seeing that the dog ATE HER BED) It steeps on the counter filling the air with the aroma of which ever tea I have chosen for the day. Today it was Green tea. Sounds good, right?
I make Olivia and Sofia breakfast, get Sofia in her highchair and get Olivia off to school. I notice my tea on the counter, cold now, and I pop it in the microwave for a minute. Quickly blog about my bad dog. Carmen wakes up and is demanding to be fed. Well.... what do I do? New diaper... Then feed the baby.
Time for Sofia to get out of her highchair and into the bath. Plop milkdrunk Carmen in the swing and run a bath for Sofia. Bathe, dress and diapers for Sof. Change Carmens diaper. Uh, oh. Carmen is hungry again. Sit down at the computer and feed Carmen while one handedly typing a good morning to my Man Muffin. Check the diaper and baby pages. Change another set of diapers. Pop in a load of laundry and fold a load of towels. Read Sofia her potty book, and the bees book. Go to heat up some pasta for Sofia and notice that my tea is still sitting in the microwave. Pop it in for another minute. Get Sofia in her highchair and bounce crying Carmen in my arms while getting the pasta and chicken on a plate for Sof and placing it on her highchair. Hmmm.... is she hungry? Why, yes. Feed Carmen. When Carmen is finished and sound asleep, I remember the tea. Cold again, and pop it in the microwave again. Notice Sofia has rubbed her cheesypastachicken plate all over her freshly washed head. Also notice she is asleep in her highchair. I lay her on the couch for her nap. I take my shower, finally. Sofia wakes before I can even get dressed. I get dressed by putting my jammies back on. Run another bath and toss Sofia back in. Wash her hair quickly and hear a knock at the door. Grab her out of the tub and answer the door. A nice neighbor seeing how I'm doing. My hair is still in a towel, Sofia is running around naked, Carmen is now crying because Sofia is trying to shove a binky in her mouth. Get Sofia dressed. Change diapers.
Neighbor leaves, I feed Carmen and give Sofia some juice. Olivia comes home from school and I hop on the computer to goof off for a minute or 10.
Olivia has a small tantrum because I tell her to clean her room. She comes down with more laundry and I start a load. I wash the dishes while O plays with the girls. Notice my tea. Microwave it, yet again. I'm going to drink it right away this time. Oh, I can't. It's too hot. Realize that I need to write this day down so I can look back and laugh one day. Carmen starts fussing and wants to be fed again. Carmen is in my arms sleeping and I've typed this out one handed. Now she's pooping.
Next, (after I change diapers again) I need to go start dinner and my tea is cold again. I'm going to dump it out now because I don't even want it anymore!!
I'm sure I've missed a few things.... but it's chaotic around here. And this day still has a few hours left.

BAD dog!

Ooooooh. Sadie is SUCH a BAD DOG!!! AS I was going to sleep last night I hear her chewing. I sneak up on her and see her trying to eat one of Sofias toys. So...I put her in the laundry room so she can't damage anything else. I wake up this morning and go to let her out of the laundry room and find that she ATE HER BED!

BAD BAD BAD DOG!!!! My day is starting out SO fine.

Why????????????

I walk into the gym locker room last night and the first thing I see is a big naked ass sitting bare on the bench. I look around, and sure enough... more naked asses bare on the bench. Now, I wouldn't sit my naked privates on a public seat. If I wanted a seat, I'd use a towel. But now I don't even want to put a towel down on the bench. What... so I can dry off with the germs of all those naked asses on my towel?
I just don't think it's sanitary. Is it? I mean, am I overreacting? Is it normal? Am *I* the one who's the locker room freak?

I got all 3 together!!

Kisses from Sofia!

So, I did it...

I joined a gym. And I went. I think I can do this. I feel so good today.

I'm getting out my photo equiptment and I am going to try and get the girls (Sofia) to sit still for a picture or 10. It's so hard to get a picture of them (Sofia) looking at the camera, not crying (Sofia) or not trying to run away (Sofia).
Let's see what I can get.

National Body Challenge 2006

THE WEIGH IN....
A whopping 139 pounds. And yes, for me, 139 pounds IS whopping.
Goal: lose 20 lbs
Exercise: gym 3x/week, walk 1 hour 2x/week
Foods: More whole grains, less saturated fats, cut out junk foods (I'm a junk food fiend), cut out fast foods, cut out Sodas. Definitely more fruits and vegetables.
There is NO way I'm giving up carbs. Plus... I'm breastfeeding, so I need a fair amount of food.

Next weigh in... 1 week.
I'm already scared.

The 23rd consecutive day of rain.

And it's showing no signs of stopping. It's depressing, really. It has rained every day since Dec. 19th in Seattle. The record was set in 1953 and it was 33 days. The second runner up was in 1966 and it was 25 days. We're going to beat that one. Oh, joy.

Rain doesn't usually bother me. But when you're bumming anyway... it makes it worse. If Alex were here we could snuggle up and listen to the rain like we do. I love the rain when Alex is home. I miss that man!

She's in the shop.

For a week. my poor embroidery machine. :( But at least she'll sew properly when I get her back! I haven't sewn in a while... since Carmen was born. Funny, because now I REALLY want to!

She cried for more than an hour straight!

This is a first for me. None of my babies ever really cried. Carmen cried longer that I've ever heard a baby cry tonight. She's sleeping now in her bouncy. It's the only thing that's worked. I swear. I walked her around, held her close, held her facing me, burped her, changed her, fed her, cood at her, sang to her. I set her down in the bouncy and turned on the vibrations, bounced it and she conked out. She's not wanting to nurse either. She eats a bit, gets mad and cries. I wonder what's going on. ???
I hope this doesn't turn into an every day occurrence.

I hope that bringing her to bed doesn't start another crying gig.

I have to be fair.

And show off The Divine miss O as well. She's an amazing child.

I walked away for 1 minute.....

Do I even need to say anything??

My little fatty...

She looks so much like daddy! ·:*¨¨*:·..·:*¨swoon*:·..·:*¨¨*:·..·:*¨·

I can't sleep.

What I'd give to have Alex home.

I was stuck in traffic today. And I was fuming. Until we came upon the accident and I realized that it was a bad one. A freeway closing sort of accident. A fatality accident. A flipped over, burned up truck. Nobody could have survived that. And I realized that being stuck in traffic is far better than being the cause of the traffic jam. And that I sometimes need to have more heart. Even if it were just a fender bender... I'd still rather be the one stuck in traffic and not having to deal with the problems accidents bring. So for each time I cursed under my breath when the speed limit dropped.. I'm sorry.

Gone, again.

I'm not even going to pretend that this will be easy. I dropped him off this morning for another combat deployment. I'm so sad. For the things he'll miss. For the days I'll miss.
I can see Sofia standing at the screen door shouting "Dada, DADA!" when he pulls in from work. She screams and throws herself into his arms. EVERY time. It doesn't get old for her. And I have no idea when she will notice that it will be months before she can do that again. Will it be tonight, when he doesn't come home for dinner? Will it be in a few days? Olivia understands. Carmen has no idea. But poor Sofia. She is such a daddys girl.
And I pray. I pray so hard that my husband comes home to me safely. I pray that his girls get to keep their daddy. I pray that I have the strength to do this again.

His shirt smells so good. I wonder how long the scent will linger.

Alex,

I LOVE YOU. Be careful. You're my life. My soul mate. My air. Good thing I hid your shirt. But it won't keep your scent nearly long enough.


Yours forever,
Berritt

The word "fart"

isn't in the spell check. Just a random something I learned this morning.

Sofia

I was just having one of those "Awwwwww" moments. Sofia was watching TV (I know, I'm bad) while I was checking email. I looked over at her and she's sitting about 3 inches from the screen, sort of squatting.... In a cute way. She's wearing her pink footed jammies that are too big. She reminds me of a pink bunny.
Anyway... I called over to her and she smiled a huge smile, ran over to me with her arms up and planted a sloppy kiss on my cheek when I picked her up. I LOOOOOOVE that kid! She's on my lap now, trying to break the John Coltrane CD, squirming and smelling like a fart. OK... Time to get down!